Midheaven

Yearning not for love or something material, but something beyond touch. Beyond physicality. It is difficult to word. A majestic feeling. Reaching deep into oneself to excavate this sensation, but the question becomes, how?

Unearthing a sense of completion challenges one to explore the spiritual side of what that might entail. Some of the earliest uses of sound art can be seen religiously, through meditation and worship. Reflecting on these practices inspired me to explore my connection to sound. Challenging myself, I wrote (as simply and concisely as possible) piece by piece what I believe to be my process to find “completion” could be. 

“A feeling to a longing.  

A longing to a yearning. 

A yearning to a prayer. 

A prayer to a vibration.

A vibration to a frequency. 

A piece to a puzzle. 

Beyond touch. 

Beyond knowledge.” 

Understanding a feeling, accepting it, and morphing it into something greater for myself. 

During Alexandra Hamilton-Ayres’ lecture, she spoke on imposter syndrome in sound art. Learning that she began her journey in sound art with a third-grade level education in piano resonated with me. The idea of transforming into a virtuoso to become a sound artist was blocking my path of completion. I attempted to convey this by layering the vocals on top of each other, becoming more offset as time goes by. Showing that the said “path” of completion is distracting and chaotic. As the spoken word plays, the offset vocals become more modulated and distorted, emphasizing this entropy. 

Originally I titled this ‘A Piece to a Puzzle’, commenting on the final piece of something to be completed until I fell into another research hole. I decided to title this piece ‘Midheaven’. Researching into astrology, I found that the midheaven placement in ones’ chart is essentially the ‘path to success’. For example, my midheaven is placed in Sagittarius which in short means I am both an eternal student and teacher. The ideology of a path leading forward has been somewhat of a constant for me these last few weeks, so when I learned this, I knew it would be the title.

Envisioning a physical path, I followed the spoken word with a recording of my steps crunching through the wet grass and leaves to intensify the visualization of the world I built. As the piece plays, chaos ensues with contact microphones, where I intended to show the difficulty this path presents. As the disorder subsides, a serene conclusion presents itself. I recorded my Grandmother singing to me in Bosnian where her lyrics roughly translate to “Life does not go fast; rest.” Along with being a tender moment, I found this very appropriate for this piece. Reflecting the importance of stillness and patience when continuing down the path to completion. Beneath this moment, soft, distorted wind chimes sway in the wind, emphasizing the tranquility, and concluding this piece.  

Oliveros. P, (1974), ‘Sonic Meditations’, (Smith Publications), Available at: https://moodle.arts.ac.uk/pluginfile.php/1010633/mod_resource/content/1/Oliveros%20Sonic-Meditations.pdf 

Because of a Flower (2020) Ana Roxanne Available at: https://anaroxanne.bandcamp.com/album/because-of-a-flower-2

Marie, Loela. “Your Success Style: Sagittarius Midheaven.” MK Astrology, 6 Sept. 2018, Available at: mkastrology.net/your-success-style-sagittarius-midheaven/.